A Writing Rose

Santuary for Women

Spiritual Abuse

Hi ladies,

I thought long and hard about writing on this topic. But yet, the more I thought about it, the more I decided it needed to be addressed.

Spiritual abuse happens in church and religious settings. It is easy to allow it to happen too. I have been the victim of spiritual abuse and church abuse.

This link has some definitions for spiritual abuse. I do not agree with everything listed on the site but it serves as a starting point for defining spiritual abuse.

I learned in my healing process that if a church member, leader, or even a pastor told me “THUS SAYETH THE LORD…………………” that it was something I needed to really pray about and get direction from the Lord for. If I did not agree with their advice or demands, I did not do what they commanded. I used to not be that way. I had a hard time standing up to people. Through counseling and healing I was able to learn to stand on my own two feet and make religious decisions for myself and my family. Did I make mistakes, yes. But the more I healed, the more I saw spiritual abuse for what it was…..abuse.

Most pastors and church folk are nice and try to live good lives. So do I. As the years have rolled by, I have come to realize that the critics who critizied me and told me “thus sayeth the Lord”, needed to pull the weeds in their own yard and leave me and mine to pull the weeds in our yard.

Ladies, God gave you a brain and a direct line to Him. Use it. You are quite capable at hearing from the Lord just like the “self-righteous who are busy bodies in other peoples business.” Remember you have to answer to the Lord for your life and they have to answer to the Lord for theirs.

Google “spiritual abuse” and find sites that have sound common sense advice. Use your Bible to see what the Lord says about that. He does not want us to be in bondage to legalism or abusive, demanding “leaders”.

Spiritual abuse will happen as long as we let it happen.

I saw this quote on a church marquee.

“Do not be like the rooster who thought the sun rose to hear him crow.”

There are “roosters” in religious circles. Learn to discern who they are and how to deal with them.

I could write so much more on this topic but I’ll let it be for now.


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